The saints on suffering 4

When IF and my other crosses are feeling extra heavy, I find encouragement reading words from the saints, especially when they speak about suffering.

For previous posts in this series, go here: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

"To love God’s will in consolations is a good love when it is truly God’s will we love and not the consolation wherein it lies. Still, it is a love without opposition, repugnance, or effort. Who would not love so worthy a will in so agreeable a form? To love God’s will in His commandments, counsels, and inspirations is the second degree of love and it is much more perfect. It carries us forward to renounce and give up our own will, and enables us to abstain from and forbear many pleasures, but not all of them. To love suffering and affliction out of love for God is the summit of most holy charity. In it nothing is pleasant but the divine will alone; there is great opposition on the part of our nature; and not only do we forsake all pleasures, but we embrace torments and labors." ~St. Francis de Sales

"I am suffering, and suffering very much, but thanks to our good Jesus I still feel a little strength, and when aided by Jesus what is the creature not capable of doing?" ~St. Padre Pio

"You should humble yourself before God instead of becoming dejected when He sends you His Son's sufferings and makes you aware of your weakness." ~St. Padre Pio

"As regards the spiritual trials to which the paternal goodness of the heavenly Father is subjecting you, I beg you to be resigned and if possible tranquil on the assurances of he who takes the place of God, and who speaks to you in his name; who loves you in Him and who desires every blessing for you. You are suffering, it is true, but with resignation, because God is with you and you don't offend Him, but you love Him. You are suffering but believe, also, that Jesus is suffering within you, with you, and for you." ~St. Padre Pio

"The greatest grace God can give someone is to send him a trial he cannot bear with his own powers—and then sustain him with His grace so he may endure to the end and be saved."
~St. Justin Martyr

"Let us go my soul, go and speak with the good Lord, to work with Him, to walk with Him, to fight and to suffer with him. You will work, but He will bless your work; you will walk, but He will bless your steps; you will suffer, but He will bless your tears. How great, how noble, how consoling it is to do everything in the company and under the gaze of the good Lord, and to think that he sees everything, counts everything!" ~St. John Vianney

"If you suffer with him, you will reign with him. If you weep with him, you shall rejoice with him; If you die with him on the cross of tribulation, you shall possess heavenly mansions in the splendor of the saints and, in the Book of Life, your name shall be called glorious among men." ~St. Clare

(about the apostles in a boat all night during a storm - Matthew 14:22-33) "Jesus suffers them to be tossed the whole night so as to inspire them with greater desire for him. This the Lord ever does: when he is to rescue from any evil, he brings in things terrible and difficult. When divine aid is near, the Lord permits us to be afflicted all the more, so that then we may receive his help with more devotion and thanksgiving." ~St. John Chrysostom

"Nothing unites us so closely to the Sacred Heart of our Lord Jesus Christ as the cross which is the most precious pledge of His love." ~St. Margaret Mary Alacoque

"Abandon yourself blindly into the hands of this Heavenly Father Who loves you better and more than you love yourself. . . He will take care of you despite every difficulty." ~Bl. Columba Marmion

"In times of desolation, God conceals Himself from us so that we can discover for ourselves what we are without Him."
~St. Margaret of Cortona

"I would, then, that I could convince spiritual persons that this road to God consists not in a multiplicity of meditations nor in ways or methods of such, nor in consolations, although these things may in their own way be necessary to beginners; but that it consists only in the one thing that is needful, which is the ability to deny oneself truly, according to that which is without and to that which is within, giving oneself up to suffering for Christ’s sake. . . For progress comes not save through the imitation of Christ, Who is the Way, the Truth and the Life, and no man comes to the Father but by Him." ~St. John of the Cross

"You must believe in truth that whatever God gives or permits is for your salvation." ~St. Catherine of Siena

"You will save more souls through prayer and suffering than will a missionary through his teachings and sermons alone." ~Jesus to St. Faustina

"If the angels were capable of envy, they would envy us for two things: one is the receiving of Holy Communion, and the other is suffering." ~Jesus to St. Faustina

“You will be consoled according to the greatness of your sorrow and affliction; the greater the suffering, the greater will be the reward." ~St. Mary Magdalene de Pazzi

"I always want to see you behaving like a brave soldier who does not complain about his own suffering but takes his comrades' wounds seriously and treats his own as nothing but scratches." ~St. Therese of Lisieux

“If God gives you an abundant harvest of trials, it is a sign of great holiness which He desires you to attain. Do you want to become a great saint? Ask God to send you many sufferings. The flame of Divine Love never rises higher than when fed with the wood of the Cross, which the infinite charity of the Savior used to finish His sacrifice. All the pleasures of the world are nothing compared with the sweetness found in the gall and vinegar offered to Jesus Christ. That is, hard and painful things endured for Jesus Christ and with Jesus Christ." ~St. Ignatius of Loyola

These last two were written by a priest suffering from terminal cancer:

"Our faith is based on a real, personal encounter with Jesus Christ. How does this happen? For those who believe, this encounter can happen anytime or all of the time. In a particular manner, though, and I would say privileged manner, it happens through suffering. Suffering opens doors that are not open otherwise. My experience of suffering these past weeks has forced me to cry out to God, to cry out to other people for help... The spirit of self-sufficiency and independence must die to give way to the spirit of openness and dependence on others. Along with this comes a brutal fact: I am powerless. I am powerless before the limitations of my humanity and I am powerless before the forces of evil. We know these things on a certain conscious level, but nothing confronts us with these truths like suffering. And here in this place of vulnerability, is where Jesus is most present." ~Fr. Will

"Those who suffer attract the attention of our Lord's Heart in a special way. He desires to come close to those who suffer, because he is mercy. He wants to help us and comfort us and heal us. He is able to come close to those who suffer because the suffering have broken hearts desperate for healing. The desire for mercy makes us capable of receiving it. Those who suffer know of this desire, a desperation for help. While painful to be in that place, it appears the only way possible for us fallen human beings: 'unless you take up your cross you cannot be my disciple.'" ~Fr. Will

Novena to Sts. Joachim and Anne

The feast day of Saints Joachim and Anne, the parents of the Blessed Virgin Mary and grandparents of Jesus, is coming up on July 26th.  They experienced infertility and were childless for twenty years.  (Twenty!  That certainly puts my five years in perspective...)  Their community snubbed them because they thought barrenness was a punishment from God.  As if infertility isn't isolating enough already!  One day Joachim went to the temple with the desire to offer sacrifice but he was not allowed to because he had no children.  Filled with shame and grief, he went off to the wilderness for forty days to fast and pray (and complain to God about being childless) where an angel visited him and told him he would have a daughter.  Back at home, Anne was begging God for a child when an angel visited her too and gave her the same news.  She was forty years old when the Virgin Mary was born.

If you'd like to pray the novena below, it starts tomorrow and goes through the day before their feast day.  All those struggling with IF or miscarriage are in my prayers.

Good parents of the Blessed Virgin Mary,
grandparents of our Savior, Jesus Christ,

When life seems barren,
   help us to trust in God’s mercy.

When we are confused,
   help us to find the way to God.

When we are lost in the desert,
   lead us to those whom God has called us to love.

When our marriage seems lifeless,
   show us the eternal youth of the Lord.

When we are selfish,
   teach us to cling only to that which lasts.

When we are afraid,
   help us to trust in God.

When we are ashamed,
   remind us that we are God’s children.

When we sin,
   lead us to do God’s will.

You who know God’s will for husband and wife,
   help us to live chastely.

You who know God’s will for the family,
   keep all families close to you.

You who suffered without children,
   intercede for all infertile couples.

You who trusted in God’s will,
   help us to respect God’s gift of fertility.

You who gave birth to the Blessed Mother,
   inspire couples to be co-creators with God.

You who taught the Mother of God,
   teach us to nurture children in holy instruction.

You whose hearts trusted in God,
   hear our prayers for . . . (mention your requests here)

Pray with us for the ministry of Catholic family life.
Pray with us for the ministry of Natural Family Planning.
Pray with us for all who give their time, talent and treasure to this good work.

Hail Mary. . . Our Father. . . Glory Be to the Father. . .

God of our fathers, you gave Saints Anne and Joachim the privilege of being the parents of Mary, the mother of your incarnate Son. May their prayers help us to attain the salvation you have promised to your people. We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Source:  USCCB website

The saints on suffering 3

For more quotes, parts one and two are here and here.

"One must not think that a person who is suffering is not praying. He is offering up his sufferings to God, and many a time he is praying much more truly than one who goes away by himself and meditates his head off, and, if he has squeezed out a few tears, thinks that is prayer."  ~St. Teresa of Avila

"He who goes to meet the cross, goes in the opposite direction to crosses; he meets them, perhaps, but he is pleased to meet them; he loves them; he carries them courageously. They unite him to Our Lord; they purify him; they detach him from this world; they remove all obstacles from his heart; they help him to pass through life, as a bridge helps us to pass over water..."  ~St. John Vianney

"Whether, therefore, we receive what we ask for, or do not receive it, let us still continue steadfast in prayer. For to fail in obtaining the desires of our heart, when God so wills it, is not worse than to receive it; for we know not as He does, what is profitable to us."  ~St. John Chrysostom

"If you seek patience, you will find no better example than the cross. Great patience occurs in two ways: either when one patiently suffers much, or when one suffers things which one is able to avoid and yet does not avoid. Christ endured much on the cross, and did so patiently, because when he suffered he did not threaten; he was led like a sheep to the slaughter and he did not open his mouth." ~St. Thomas Aquinas

"Thank the good God for having visited you through suffering; if we knew the value of suffering, we would have asked for it." ~St. Brother Andre

"Do not give into fear in the face of the changes and chances of this life. Rather, as they arise, look at them with full trust in God, to whom you belong, who will enable you - through His powerful love - to profit from them. He has guided you thus far in life; so hold fast to His dear hand, and He will lead you safely through every trial. Whenever you cannot stand, he will carry you in his loving arms. Do not be anxious about what may happen tomorrow. The same Eternal Father who takes care of you today will take care of you tomorrow, and every day of your life. He will either shield you from suffering, or give you unfailing strength to bear it. Be at peace then, and put aside all useless thoughts, all vain dreads and all anxious imaginations." ~St. Francis de Sales

"If at times it seems that the Lord is not listening to us, we must be careful not to lose heart. It may be that He wants us to shout a little louder into the ears of His goodness, to prove as a result the greatness of His mercy... When the Lord withdraws His consolations in prayer, He does not do this to discourage us or create a gulf between us, but to force us to come closer to His goodness, to practice perseverance and to give some proof of our patience." ~St. Francis de Sales

"The most beautiful Credo is that which comes from your lips in darkness, in sacrifice, in pain, in the supreme effort of an unbending will for good. It is this which, like a stroke of lightning, penetrates the darkness of the soul; it is this which in the flash of the tempest lifts you and leads you to God." ~St. Padre Pio

“Those who love God do not protest, whatever He may ask of them, nor doubt His kindness when He sends them difficult hours. A sick person takes medicine without asking the physician to justify its bitter taste because the patient trusts the doctor’s knowledge; so the soul that has sufficient faith accepts all the events of life as gifts of God in the serene assurance that God knows best.” ~Venerable Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen

"Therefore, I will trust Him, whatever I am, I can never be thrown away. If I am in sickness, my sickness may serve Him, in perplexity, my perplexity may serve Him. If I am in sorrow, my sorrow may serve Him. He does nothing in vain. He knows what He is about. He may take away my friends. He may throw me among strangers. He may make me feel desolate, make my spirits sink, hide my future from me. Still, He knows what He is about." ~Blessed John Henry Newman

"The cross will never oppress you; its weight might cause you to stagger, but its strength will sustain you."  ~St. Padre Pio

"Don't fear adversity because it brings you to the foot of the cross and the cross puts you at the gates of Heaven, where you can find the one who is the champion of death, and He will introduce you to eternity."  ~St. Padre Pio

"The Lord sometimes makes you feel the weight of the cross. Although the weight seems intolerable, you are able to carry it, because the Lord, in His love and mercy extends a Hand to you and gives you strength." ~St. Padre Pio

"In darkness, at times of tribulation and distress of the spirit, Jesus is with you. In such a state you see nothing but darkness, but I can assure you on God's behalf that the light of the Lord is all around you and pervades your spirit. . .You see yourself forsaken and I assure you that Jesus is holding you tighter than ever to His divine Heart." ~St. Padre Pio

“God values your readiness to face suffering and deprivation for love of him more than all the consolations, spiritual visions, and meditations which you may have.” ~St. John of the Cross.

"If you fall into some sin, humble yourself at once and rise again with a more fervent act of love. When something you do not want happens to you, offer it to God immediately by an act of conformity with His holy Will, and acquire the habit of always repeating in all adverse situations the words: 'Such is God's Will and such also is mine.' Acts of resignation are acts of love most dear and pleasing to the Heart of God." ~St. Alphonsus Liguori

"Many people would like to attain union with God but they cannot bear the contradictions he sends them. They hate the sickness which strikes them, or the poverty they suffer, or the insults they receive. Since they cannot be resigned, they never succeed in reaching total union with God." ~St. Alphonsus Liguori

“Holy Communion is the shortest way to Heaven. There are others, innocence for instance, but that is for little children; penance, but we are afraid of it; generous endurance of the trials of life, but when they approach us, we weep and pray to be delivered. Once for all, beloved children, the surest, easiest, shortest way is by the Holy Eucharist.” ~Pope St. Pius X

And some words from a non-saint...

"My child, God will not allow you to be tempted, tested, or tormented beyond your strength. His help will always be equal to the trial He sends. Give heed to His grace, for it already speaks to you, and respond to His inspirations. If God has more crosses in store for someone, He gives greater graces that the person may bear them. Crosses are the most precious gifts God can give His creature; and the creature's acceptance of them is the most pleasing sacrifice it can offer its Creator. If the crosses He intends for you are heavy, that means He has great plans for your sanctification. Do you want to prevent those divine plans being fulfilled?"  ~Alexander de Rouville (The Imitation of Mary)

Patron saint of 2014

I've been using the saint generator here to choose a patron saint for the past few years.

Last year my patron saint was St. Jude, patron of desperate situations and impossible/lost causes.  I think fixing our IF is getting to be close to lost, so St. Jude seemed an appropriate choice.  I also asked him to pray that DH would find a job, which I knew would be a difficult process.  Neither prayer has been answered yet with a "yes."  I hope a year's worth of prayers from him have some kind of good effect.  I know they weren't in vain.  Maybe both requests are so close to impossible that we need more than a year's worth of prayers from the saint known to make the impossible happen (well, God makes it happen but St. Jude intercedes).

Even though DH has been out of work for more than a year, I am impressed with his attitude, which I think is a major fruit of those prayers.  He's been unemployed for a long stretch before, and he became very pessimistic and angry about the situation.  So far he's in good spirits and is optimistic, even though it's taking longer than he hoped.  The vast majority of the hiring in his field takes places once a year, so most of the time he is just waiting and looking if there are new jobs posted (all of which will be filled in the summer).  I'm still asking begging St. Jude for prayers that DH finds a job this year.

So who is my patron saint for 2014?

(source)

St. Isidore the Farmer

Feast Day:  May 15

Here's the list of things he is patron of:

• against the death of children
• farmers
• laborers
• ranchers
• rural communities
• livestock
• for rain

At first I was like, "Really?  Did this saint generator malfunction?"

I'm not a farmer.  I would need to have children before I could pray that they don't die.

So I looked him up.  His only son died at a young age.  He and his wife were convinced it was God's will that they not have any more children.  The article I found said they lived together "in chastity" the rest of their lives, but I think it meant "in continence" (no intercourse during marriage).  If they lived chastely, they weren't necessarily avoiding all intercourse but could have been using NFP to avoid pregnancy or whatever version of periodic abstinence was popular in the year 1100.  :)

Then it made more sense.  He and his wife were a childless couple for most of their marriage.  His wife is a canonized saint also--St. Mary de la Cabeza.  Yes, I can definitely use the prayers of someone who knows what it's like to live without children (even if they chose it and I didn't).  Hopefully he doesn't mind praying that we could have children, but if he wants to pray for us to find peace living without children, that would be welcome too.

St. Isidore the Farmer, pray for us!

"To ensure that the saints pray and intercede for us, we must invoke them and ask their help. The best way to celebrate their feasts is to realize the power they have with God for obtaining the graces of which we stand in need. Our Lord is so pleased when we profit from the intercession of the saints that, wishing to bestow on us some favor, He often inspires us to seek their mediation and invites us to ask them to pray for us. With full confidence we should seek their help and turn to them, especially on their feast days, without doubting for a moment that they will listen to us and will obtain for us what we are asking." ~St. Francis de Sales

Saints Perpetua and Felicity

I decided to dip a toe back in the blogging waters on the feast day of my favorite saints.  Their story has inspired me since I first heard it back in college.

I took this picture at the Basilica of the National
Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in
Washington DC.

St. Perpetua was a 22-year-old noble woman with an infant still breastfeeding.  St. Felicity was her slave and was eight months pregnant.  They lived in Carthage (northern Africa) during a time when it was illegal to be a Christian according to Roman law.  They were imprisoned with a few others and sentenced to death because the authorities found out that they were Christians.  Perpetua was able to still breastfeed her baby while in jail because the guards accepted bribes and allowed her baby to be brought to the prison periodically.  She prayed that the baby would wean before she died.  Felicity prayed that she would deliver her baby prematurely so she could die with her friends and not alone. (Rome thought the unborn were sacred, so they would not kill a pregnant woman.)  Both prayers were answered.  A couple days before the scheduled execution, Felicity went into labor and delivered a daughter who was adopted by a Christian woman.  Both died as martyrs in an amphitheater.  Perpetua's last words to her fellow Christians were: "Stand fast in the faith and love one another."

Even though they were both mothers, I think they are still great examples for (infertile) me.  They put their love of God and desire to live the truth of their faith above all else--above a comfortable life and above their children.  For me, it's a reminder to put God before my desire for children and let Him satisfy me, as difficult as that is sometimes when the sorrow over our infertility is great.

Stayed tuned for some more blog updates (hopefully) soon.  :)

Sts. Perpetua and Felicity, pray for us!

P.S.  I have been working on DH for years to convince him that Perpetua is an excellent choice for a girl's middle name.  No luck so far.  I guess I might have a lot of time yet to do so...if, God-willing, we ever have a daughter...  No progress in that area, though.  :(

The saints on suffering 2

Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.  ~Luke 14:27

Those words were a challenge to hear this morning during the Gospel.  Even though I've been IF for years, I still sometimes wonder what "carrying this cross" really looks like.  I thought a little wisdom from the saints might shed some light on things.  I compiled quotes from the saints that I found to be helpful and encouraging.  I found some nice images too.  The previous list of quotes I gathered is here.

"The more we are afflicted in this world, the greater is our assurance in the next; the more sorrow in the present, the greater will be our joy in the future."  ~St. Isadore of Seville

"We ought to be persuaded that what God refuses to our prayer, He grants to our salvation."
~St. Augustine

"Let us understand that God is a physician, and that suffering is a medicine for salvation, not a punishment for damnation."  ~St. Augustine

"The everlasting God has in His wisdom foreseen from eternity the cross that He now presents to you as a gift from His inmost heart. This cross He now sends you He has considered with His all-knowing eyes, understood with His divine mind, tested with His wise justice, warmed with loving arms and weighed with His own hands to see that it be not one inch too large and not one ounce too heavy for you. He has blessed it with His holy Name, anointed it with His consolation, taken one last glance at you and your courage, and then sent it to you from heaven, a special greeting from God to you, an alms of the all-merciful love of God."  ~St. Francis de Sales

"Through the cross we are united to Him who was nailed to it, our heavenly spouse. Every instant of our lives must be accepted as favor, with all that it brings of happiness and suffering. But we must accept the cross with more gratitude than anything else. Our crosses detach us from earth and therefore draw us closer to God."  ~Bl. Charles de Foucauld

"If you really want to love Jesus, first learn to suffer, because suffering teaches you to love."
~St. Gemma Galgani

"Let us fix our eyes on the crucifix in every difficult moment, and that gaze will renew our courage."
~St. Madeleine Sophie Barat

"Melancholy is the poison of devotion. When one is in tribulation, it is necessary to be more happy and more joyful because one is nearer to God."
~St. Clare of Assisi

"Love that cannot suffer is not worthy of that name."  ~St. Clare of Assisi

  

cassiepeasedesigns.com

"In a time of desolation, never forsake the good resolutions you made in better times. Strive to remain patient—a virtue contrary to the troubles that harass you—and remember that you will be consoled." ~St. Ignatius of Loyola

"It is by means of trials that God binds to Him the souls he loves."  ~St. Padre Pio

"In this life Jesus does not ask you to carry the heavy cross with Him, but a small piece of His cross, a piece that consists of human suffering."  ~St. Padre Pio

"The life of a Christian is nothing but a perpetual struggle against self; there is no flowering of the soul to the beauty of its perfection except at the price of pain." ~St. Padre Pio

"Would that mortal men might know how wonderful is divine grace, how beautiful, how precious; what riches are hidden therein, what treasures, what joys, what delights. If they but knew, surely they would direct their energy with all care and diligence to procuring sufferings and afflictions for themselves. Instead of good fortune all men everywhere would seek out troubles, illness and suffering that they might obtain the inestimable treasure of grace. This is the final profit to be gained from patient endurance. No one would complain about the cross or about hardships coming seemingly by chance upon him, if he realized in what balance they are weighed before being distributed to men." ~St. Rose of Lima

"Without the burden of afflictions it is impossible to reach the height of grace. The gift of grace increases as the struggle increases."  ~St. Rose of Lima

"Apart from the cross, there is no other ladder by which we can get to heaven."  ~St. Rose of Lima

"Tribulation is a gift from God; one that He especially gives His special friends."  ~St. Thomas More

cassiepeasedesigns.com

"He did not say you would not be troubled, you would not be tempted, you would not be distressed, but He did say you would not be overcome."  ~St. Jose Maria Escriva

 

"Pain and suffering have come into your life, but remember pain, sorrow, suffering are but the kiss of Jesus—a sign that you have come so close to Him that He can kiss you."  ~Bl. Mother Teresa

"Suffering is a gift, though like all gifts, it depends on how we receive it. That is why we need a pure heart, to see the hand of God, to feel the hand of God, to recognize the gift of God in our suffering." ~Bl. Mother Teresa

"Ah, how consoling for a Christian is the blessed thought that God sees him, that God witnesses his sorrow and his troubles, that God is by his side! Ah, what is still better, that God presses him tenderly to His heart!"  ~St. John Vianney

"If accepted with love, suffering can be a privileged path to sanctity."  ~St. John Paul II

And here are two from not (yet?) saints but wise words I wanted to include...

"Sometimes my worst day—one filled with pain and suffering—in the eyes of God, is my best day if I've born it cheerfully and I've born it with love."  ~Mother Angelica

"You who say in silence: 'Jesus, I trust in you' teach us that there is no faith more profound, no hope more alive and no love more ardent than the faith, hope and love of a person who in the midst of suffering places himself securely in God’s hands.”  ~Pope Benedict XVI in a visit with the sick on May 27, 2006